New day!

This is Andrew.

This is his wardrobe. Notice any patterns?





Today the impossible happened. I found shirts that were NOT vertically striped. See? And Andrew not only liked them, but bought them (and they were on clearance for $7:99!).




In other good news, Andrew and I made two different kinds of lasagna yesterday.
First, Portabello Lasagna with Basil Cream from Rache Ray's 'EveryDay' magazine. I stole the recipe from my mother-in-law. :) Due to the fact that I feel downright pudgy lately, I substituted the whipping cream for fat-free half & half, and I used skim milk to make the garlic sauce. I also used less butter than it called for, and less parmesan. It wasn't as knock-out amazing as I wanted it to be, but I bet with all the called-for fat, it would be better. :D It also needed more seasoning...I'm thinking some rosemary and thyme would do the trick.
If you want the recipe, let me know. :)

Next, we made 'Christmas Lasagna' from Chef John's FoodWishes blog. It was quite excellent! According to the chef, grateable mozerella isn't legit, so we made the treck to J.B. Russos & Sons (a GREAT place to go, anyway :), and got the real stuff. We probably could've gotten it at Meijer, but it was more fun to go to Russos. AND we had a gift card. :)

In my opinion, lasagna is always better the next day. Maybe something to do with the flavors having a chance to meld together? Chili is the same way. But today we thad the 'Christmas' lasagna for lunch and it was way better than yesterday.

And that's all for today. Andrew's making coffee now (in his nicely patterned shirt) and hugging Kitty...which is possibly the most adorable thing ever. Till next time!

~Briana

Food is one of my favorite things.

Perhaps inspired by the Julie and Julia movie, I decided to blog about my food conquests. Plus, food is so delicious and pretty to look at. :)

Today I made french onion soup...my absolute favorite soup of all time. There's nothing like caramelized onions gently simmered with a dash of sherry wine and homemade beef stock, topped with bubbling gruyere cheese. Mmmmmm.

My recipe came from Foodwishes...a blog that I often frequent for the great recipes. Here's the recipe.

I also made Chicken Bryan, a dish that Andrew and I love to order at Carrabba's, at special occasions. :) We've made it a couple times, and this recipe claims to be the original. It was perfect, but I think that the poster accidently switched measurements. If you make this, be sure to use 1/2 cup of white wine and 6 tbsp of lemon juice, not vice versa as in the recipe.
Mmmm...

(These are photos I found online, not mine. Next time I'll take pictures of my own. :) )

It would've been even better with garlic mashed potatoes, but I didn't have any potatoes left. :(

There you have it.

I think Andrew and I are making lasagna this week, so I'll post our adventure when it happens. :)

~Briana

Briana Soup

If I were a soup...

I would be egg drop soup.
No, never mind...that's just what sounds good right now.
I would have a strong, moral stock,

But with a few unanswered questions mixed in.

I would be a colorful soup...artsy and full of variety

A versatile soup...something that goes with a lot of different dishes.

I'd have a good dose of guilt, slightly flavoring everything
And I'd be made with obsessive perfectionism...

But never quite there.

I WOULD NOT have lima beans in me. Ick.

I WOULD have chicken in me...because chicken is healthy.

I would be served with insecurity,

And eaten with loyalty

And enjoyed for the most part...until I get cold.

I would be hard to find,

And maybe a little difficult all around,

But absolutely desperate to please the table guests.

I would be one of those soups that have a bunch of different names,

Depending on who's eating it.

I would contain certain spices

That no one could figure out...

That's what I would be

If I were a soup.

(This post is for my old friend Destiny, who said I should start blogging again. :D)

I take my faith very seriously.
I expect people who call themselves Christians to behave like Christians.
I don't expect perfection among my fellow believers, but I do expect my them to admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness...and change.
I expect these things not only from my peers but also from myself- not because I think it should be that way, but because it's how God has called us to be.

And yet, by even writing the above, I set myself up for labels like "prude" and "that girl who makes everyone else feel guilty".
In situations where I must chose between peer conversation and God's approval, dare I say what I believe in?
No, I will not participate in crude and obscene conversation. No, I don't watch TV that blasphemes the name of God and mocks Christianity. No, I don't think pornography is funny. I will not listen to perverse jokes about sex.

Why does my stomach tighten in anxiety even as I write these words?

Recently I've realized in a much deeper way how uncool it is to voice your convictions. When I dare to mention that God might not be pleased with the conversation, I am a wet blanket. A spoil-sport. Someone that others don't want to hang with. Who wants to be with someone who can't take a joke?

But this realization comes with a irevocable understand that I have no choice. Though none go with me, still I MUST follow. Even if my closest friends slowly distance themselves from me, I have to stand my ground and cling to what I know God has placed in my heart.
This is not some arbitrary moral code that I happened to be born with. This is the word of God. I dare not comprimise what I know God has called me to in order to fit in with others. There is no option here.

So now I must learn to balance this inner conviction with love. Jesus lived a life of righteousness and yet loved others with a love so deep that he chose to die so that they could live. He was hated and mocked and isolated (WAY more than I ever have been or ever will be!) and still he loved: fiercely, loyally, undeniably. I want to be like Jesus and speak the truth in love. I want to see my peers the way God that sees them. I want to take a stand in a way that draws people to God rather than repels them. I want ME to get out of the way and let JESUS shine through.


I have so far to go. Guide me, Lord Jesus.

This weekend I am going to Cedar Point with the VT Family!

By "VT Family" I mean:

Mike - Dad-in-law
Brenda - Mom-in-law

Josh - Bro-in-law

Brooke - Sister-in-law
Alyssa and Kirsten - Nieces

Tim - Bro-in-law

Meghan - Bro-in-law's gf

Nick - Bro-in-law
Jenna - Bro-in-law's gf

Kristen - Sis-in-law

Kyle -Sis-in-law's should-be-fiance

So yeah. Andrew's extremely excited to be riding all of the amazing rollercoasters. And I am too, I suppose...it's just that I haven't had a weekend for two weeks now and I dearly love my weekends. The quietness, the still moments, the second cup of coffee, the snuggling on the couch...

"You always need margin", my mom says. The blank spaces between things. I love margin.

I should not complain, though. Life is good. I spend too much time complaining, actually...I'm tired, I'm lonely, I don't like doing homework, I don't have enough time to go grocery shopping...

I'm actually sick of hearing my brain complain. I'm working on training myself to be thankful.

For my working legs. For dry and warm clothing. For my husband. For the opportunity to be educated. For the money to go grocery shopping!

I will train this brain to be happy! "We're gonna traaaiiin you.

Speaking of thankfulness, I found another thing for which to be thankful...concerning my husband. Not that there aren't a gazillion things to be thankful about concerning him.... :D
Here it is:

In general, "things" pop into my mind constantly. Funny pictures, ambitious ideas, strange commentaries, eye-opening realizations...and when I'm with Andrew I am completely free to open my mouth and spew said "things". He might respond with a laugh or a nod or a word of advice...or maybe nothing at all. But he listens. And he doesn't think I'm stupid or unimportant. He HEARS me.

You might laugh, but I really want to be heard. You'd be amazed at the many times when people just DON'T hear me! My friend Bethany says that I have one of those voices that just blend into the background. Bethany loves me so I don't feel insulted by this...just informed. It helps me realize that some people might just honestly not hear me. And it helps prepare me for those terrible moments when I start speaking and then someone else talks right over me. Oy vey.

But anyway...I appreciate Andrew because he truly listens to me and values what I say to him. That's...wow. It's just so cool to have someone like that in your life. My mom is like that too.

People probably think I'm odd because I always bring up my mom at school. I realized that this year. "My mom always says that...", or "My mom used to...", or "My mom thinks that..."

I think that's a compliment to her...it means that I value her opinion and that her actions have made a lasting impression on me.

See? I'm not that messed up. Let this be an encouragement to all first-born PKs...there is hope. Just MOVE OUT. And you will be better friends with your family. :P

(Kidding!...sortof.)

Word of the last-couple-weeks:
Snarky.

I really really really love that word. Snarky.

That's all. I'm going to play puzzle games online until Andrew gets home.

Cyclical. I like that word.

The first week of school is over.
Well. I guess it wasn't truly a week of school...just three days. But my 'School To Do' list is a week long.
I turned 22 on Thursday...oh, I suppose that was yesterday! I was telling my brother, Aaron, that 22 is kindof a 'meh' year. 20 is cool because it's 2 decades. 21 is cool because you can drink legally...which is sort of a milestone, I suppose. But 22 is just...22. In defiance of its mediocrity, I shall note that this is only the second time in my life that I have been a double number. 11 was the first time, of course...but I hardly remember being 11.

Today I found out that two of my old friends have 'unfriended' me. That's a sobering and depressing moment...when you type in someone's name only to find that their page is not 'available to the public'. Discovering one's status as 'public' and not 'friend' is...well, I sat quietly for a moment and then I cried.

Life is truly a cyclical experience. I remember when, in my first years of high school, I was extremely introverted and shy. I read books most of the time and felt very uncomfortable in public situations. In my later high school years I made a dramatic 180 and became the socializing queen of the homeschool band scene. I had many friends, I spent time talking on the phone (WHAT?) and felt almost completely secure in a social setting. I did have moments of anxiety, but those moments were usually when I was hosting an event and felt responsible for the happiness of those around me.

College was the slow death of my social life. I maintained a decent friend circle when I was a freshman. As a sophomore, my circle shrunk to a handful of close friends. In my junior year, my handful of school friends graduated or left... and now I am feeling quite alone. Not to say that I'm a social outcast at school. I certainly have a handful of friends whom I genuinely like talking to. But somehow I've managed to drive away, alienate or lose nearly all of the friends I had before...to all manner of situations. They weren't all awkward situations...just college life, I suppose.
I admit, I feel lonely.

BUT.

I do have Andrew. I couldn't feel more accepted or safe with him. I know he loves me. I thought this morning that if I could spend a day with ANYONE on earth, I would chose him. And I know he would say the same.
And my family is a treasure. My siblings are becoming true friends of mine, which is an amazing process to observe. I find that moving out improves the general feeling of love amongst all family members. :) My mom is my closest "girl" friend, :) and that's priceless to me.
And then there's River. I wouldn't leave this haven of love and security if you paid me millions. Honestly, I know I belong at River. The older I get the more I appreciate my church family.

So...perhaps this lonliness I feel at school isn't all for nothing. Maybe God is teaching me to look to my true friends...those people who have been here all along, who are honest and faithful and loving even when I fail them. My husband, my family and my church.
I'm sure that someday God will supply a "bosom friend" with whom I can be completely at ease. But until then, I will be happy with where I am. I will appreciate the connections I have.

And I'll work on my social anxieties and insecurities...
"God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and a sound mind".

Of I go to write journals...of the academic sort. :)

Oh, you know...

Last post, I contemplated a use for my crazy quilt squares. Well, here ya go! My 'scrap bag'.
I'm not posing...I'm just naturally that cool.
:P


Tomorrow if the first day of school.
I can't say I'm particularly happy about it. I have one year left, and really, just one sememster of real classes. So I should be happy and excited, right? Well, I'm not.
I'm tired of school before I even start this year. I got a call from a learning center that I applied at this summer and they wanted to interview me for a full time position there... and I wanted so badly just to GO and start life. But I know I need to finish what I started. That's usually a good policy, right?


My school is a frustration to me.
When I first went there I was full of inspiration. I had been taking lessons from Mr. Good, which was an...amazing experience. I was ready to learn, ready to grow...I was getting on the CU train, headed to success.
But I feel as though somehow I've spent the past three years waiting for the train to actually take off.

The music department at CU has been at a trickling decline for some years now. In the time I've been at CU, we've switched department chairs twice. Mr. Hollinger, the band director, left my freshman year. We've been through 3 office secretaries: Anna, Amy and Susan...and now Susan's leaving too. Mr. Burghart was let go in my sophomore year. In the second semester of my sophomore year, my close friend Bethany switched schools. Andrew left to work full time. This year, Proffesor Weston and Professor Wakeman were let go. Dr. Bohn moved to different state, Mr. Peck retired and Mr. Britsch left to work at GVSU.
The CU music department that I thought was, is not. It's an crumbling foundation. It's a sinking ship.

A dilemma I face this year is whether or not I'll be in the CU brass quintet. I've been in it for the past three years and yet I'm very tired of it now. "My group" has moved on...Kelly and Kyle and Aaron have graduated and Andrew's working full time. I miss our quintet. It was, hands down, the best experience I had at CU. This year, I feel like I'm doing it out of obligation. I've asked the band director if there would be any other trumpet players willing to audition in my place...but I'm not sure if we have any other trumpet players this year. Last year there were two of us. One of us graduated.
But the other thing...the brass quintet is supposed to be a CU promoting group. We go to bring in new students and promote the school. But can I honestly tell the students that CU is a good place to go? If I saw myself in highschool, would I encourage myself to go there? I can't say...it's sad, but I can't say.

Perhaps as the year moves on, I'll feel more optimistic. My school does have many good attributes, outside of our department. I've learned MANY things from teachers in the Education department, particulary Professors Burgess and McAdams. I'll hold on to those things and press onward to a truly exciting future. It's true: I can't wait to be a teacher.

I've been very honest in this weblog...expressing things I haven't said publicly before. I guess I feel pretty safe considering the fact that I rarely get any readers. :)


Anyway, that's all for now. G'night!
~Bri

Sewing projects, continued

Well, I have a lot of scraps. So I started making "Crazy Quilty" squares. It takes mucho time to make these though! I estimated 80 to 100 hours of square-making before I'd have enough for a quilt. So I'm thinking about making a "Crazy Bag" instead. :)


I decided that our living room couch has been ugly for too long...so I tromped off to Fields and got this pretty buttery linen.

I haven't made the pillow covers out of this fabric yet, but I did make the contrasting green pillow covers.

The couch is still ugly (IMO) but green is ever so much better than the weird loom-gone-wrong pillows before!

Here's a close up. :)

Okay, that's it. I've got some others but they can wait for another day.

See ya around!
~Bri

It's been a while...

Hello all! It really has been quite a while! Here's what I've been up to this summer:

I went to Goodwill and found an XL purple shirt that I wished was my size. So I cut it up, fit it to my duct tape body form and added a vintage frilly accent. It's very frilly...

Sometimes I wonder why I make such girly things...I don't usually wear girly things...

I am proud of this next one. I made a jumper for Alexandra out of cute stripey knit that I found at Field's tent sale.




I have a thing for buttons...

I made the pockets and the bottom hem out of a yellow t-shirt. I'm going to try to make matching bloomers. If I'm successful, I'll post the results. :)

It turns out that if you add pictures after you've written text, they default to the top of the page. So I'm ending this post. I'll start a new one with my other sewing adventures. :)


Till then,
~Bri

Peas

The Princess and the Pea.
I always thought that this fairy tale was a ridiculous story. Being one to sleep through anything, I never understood how one little pea could be such a bother to the girl, especially through the countless mattresses. As children can be quite literal, I remember thinking that finding a way to climb to the top of those mattresses would be the painful and annoying part.

Today, I thought about the Princess and the Pea in a slightly more abstract context:
Everything can be 'right'. You're a guest in a castle, you're dressed in a lovely night gown, you're blessed with beautiful features, you're about to meet your handsome prince...
but one little thing can make you sleepless, can make you miserable...can take away your happiness.

For the princess, it was the agonizing pea. For the rest of us, it could be anything. It could be failure in a given area. It could be a fight with your mom, or a physical ailment. It could be losing your friend.
And no matter how much you try to cushion the hurt, you can still feel it...all the way through the dozens of mattresses. Everything else might be perfect, but It's still there. And you can't sleep.

What do you do with these "peas"? We certainly have control over many aspects of our lives, but perhaps the pea represents a domain you have no control over? Then what? Do I never sleep again? Do I remain bruised and miserable forever, because I can't fix it?

The apostle Paul had a "pea". Actually, he had a thorn....here's an exerpt of his letter to the Corinthians:

"To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
(2 Corinthians 12:7-10)

God sometimes choses to keep those troubling situations in our lives, because in our weakness, God's strength to sustain us is made clear. When we are weak, we realize God's incredible strength in our lives.
So maybe those peas aren't such a bad thing after all? Character building peas, I suppose.

I'm not as good as Paul, because I'm not delighting in my thorns and peas. I have yet to truly appreciate them as things that prove the power of God.
But, working towards that point, I believe that God can do mighty things...he did in the past and he can again. And I pray that he uses this time of pain and weakness to prove that He is a strong and powerful redeemer.

And, because this is the mattress I've been given, I'll keep sleeping on that pea.

The Cruel Realization

When you're young, everyone is nice. Every neighbor child is your friend. Oh, they might be mean once in a while, but really, deep down, they're nice, good people.
The mail man is nice, the lady at the grocery store is nice, the man on the street...
Everyone is good, when you're young.

As you grow older, you see "nice" people do "bad" things. It's a devastating thing: to see the pedestals, on which you placed the people in your life, come crashing down. Suddenly they aren't so good. Their smiles aren't so pure and wise. You're older now, but you desperately cling to the thought that perhaps they don't know that they did wrong. Maybe they're just oblivious to the pain they're causing?
Some are.


But then, that thing they did? They do it again. Or something worse. And this time you realize that they KNEW what they were doing. They deliberately chose it. They did what they wanted, regardless of it being wrong.
This is a hard blow. One that still gets me...
I know people choose to do bad things, but part of me still holds so tightly to the pure and stainless image of mankind. I want to see everyone as "good". I want to believe that no one would purposely hurt another.
But people do.

The false hope turns into disappointment, because I will be let down.
The disappointment turns into shame, for I too, am human. These are my brothers and sisters!
The shame turns into anger, for don't we all have a choice?
The anger turns to helplessness. Because I can't MAKE anyone choose goodness.


The helplessness makes me turn to God...for only in Him can we choose righteousness. In our own strength, we're dirty, sinful, wrong. But in God we can find healing and life.

Lord Jesus, help us. We need You so desperately!

Spring Break!

Two years ago, a certain girl couldn't wait for spring break to be over, so she could get back to school.

That certain girl no longer exists...an older, wiser one is in her stead...and good heavens, if only Spring Break could last forever!

Andrew took this past week off, so we could have a mid-semester vacation. We went to South Haven for a couple days and stayed a really cute bed and breakfast, called 'Martha's Vineyard'. South Haven is quiet this time of year, as is Saugatuck, but we enjoyed the peace and quiet very much!
The week went slowly, thank the Lord, and it was so refreshing to do absolutely nothing for a while. Of course, we visited my family a couple times (we went to see 'Blind Side' on Friday-- excellent movie!!!) and went on walks, and watched a few movies.
Last night, Andrew and I MADE ourselves go bowling with a couple of our friends...we both felt too lazy to go out, but we were so glad we did! Andrew, it turns out, is a decent bowler...and I, it turns out, am not. ;)

Now, tomorrow's Monday. I have a project to finish before Tuesday, two journals to write before Thursday, a musical to practice for before the performances this weekend, a funeral to attend, a form to fill out for student teaching, a presentation to put togethere, excuses to find for my trumpet teacher...etc.
It's the last half of the semester, and it's gonna fly!

I do have a couple fun ideas for my trumpet recital next fall. I think the theme will be 'A Few of My Favorite Things'. :)

Life is good, whether busy or not...and God is always faithful.

Love and liquid soap (in Leah style),
~Briana

Mostly pictures - People I like and love :)

Too close! Zoom out! lol

Zachary, his guitar and adoring fans.

J and Iz :)

My sister, Ivey and "my baby", Alexandra.

Amber! Such a smile.




I can't believe how old these girls are getting! Cassidy and Moriah. :)





How cute can you get? I love Sophie.

I look...really strange in this picture. But at least it's a picture of me and my mum. :)

Andrew, playing his sweet guitar (he's getting really good at it!!!)

Ivey and Mollie chillin' on my bed.

The two of us...I wonder if Andrew's capable of taking non-goofy pictures?

Nope.

There are 5 Gazillion other things I could be doing right now...

But here I am...
When I got married to Andrew, I had to get used to his "early to bed, early to rise" routine. I grew accustom to going to bed around 10...and I often got tired around 9pm because we got up so early.
But now, with Andrew working 2nd shift, my old habit of staying up till midnight has quickly reemerged.
The problem is that the LAST thing I want to do at 10pm is read articles or write papers. I know as a college student I'm not entitled to any free time...but I always feel like evenings should be a time to rest and regroup. Ergo, this weblog.

Today Andrew came to convocation with me and helped write an arrangement for 'My Jesus I Love Thee' for brass quintet. I'm really enjoying my orchestration and arranging class because of its hands on application. It's even better with Andrew helping me out. :)
We went home and ate lunch...and went our separate ways. For him: work. For me: taking a piano lesson, two hours of band, more arranging, and giving two piano lessons at the Roarks.

Somehow TOMORROW is sneaking up on me, and it's the worst kind of tomorrow. It's a TUESDAY. ugh. I HATE Tuesdays. I especially hate this tuesday because I have a trumpet lesson and I haven't practiced for it (not that I haven't played...I just haven't played what he assigned to me.)

But this too, shall pass. Soon it'll be Friday and my spring break will have started! Friday's not too far away, right? Of course right! (Yente, anyone?)

Blessings,
~Briana

The Story of Today, Some Thoughts, and Tomb Sweeping

Mmmm chips and salsa...
While I munch, I shall pontificate.

(What is it about blogs that make me want to use big words?)


Tonight, after my very long day, I went to my parent's house to teach piano lessons and then hang out for a while. The door was locked so I rang the doorbell...and the World's Most Annoying Dogs (I shall hereafter refer to them as the WMAD) ran to the door and started barking their dang heads off. There isn't an appropriate way to explain how irritating the WMAD's barks are.
Anyway.
After my lessons, I hung out with the fam for a while. Actually, I hung out with my mom. Dad and Isaac were watching the Olympics, Ivey was playing across the street and Aaron was upstairs doing...Aaron things.
So Mom and I hashed out the world's problems- exchanged our "stories" of the week and discussed how to solve them. Those are always good talks...the kinds that Mom and I have. :)
Excuse me while I chase Kitty away from the salsa...


Okay, back.
So tonight I had another hour (or so) until Andrew got home...so here I am, eating chips and salsa, watching Kitty climb "Mt. Tuba" (Andrew's tuba case...which Kitty has claimed as her personal mountain), and writing this blog.
Thursdays are so long, but I like Thursday nights the best...because then it's all behind me. Now I have Friday to look forward to, and a peaceful morning with my hunny.

Here's something I was thinking about on my way home.

Wifehood and Motherhood
(Such a matronly thing to write about, right? Don't call me matronly, I might hit you with something.)

But here's what I was thinking:
When a woman becomes both a wife AND a mother, which title is most important? To put it in different words, are you first a wife, or first a mother?
At first, I thought "First, a mother"...but then, a husband and wife are the BASE of the family! They're the beginning, the sticky gooey stuff (glue?) that holds the family together.

I'm not even close to being a mom, but here is my idea:
A woman should be firstly a wife AND a mother. Both. But if it comes to choosing, then a woman will probably rightfully choose the family that needs her the most...which would probably be her children. Kids are young, impressionable...they need their mother's protection and love. If, God forbid, a woman HAD to choose between her husband and her child, I think she'd be justified in choosing her child. At least until the kid is an adult.
Once a kid is grown, I think it's another matter. Then, perhaps, "wife" is most important-- because the little peeps are out of the house and the husband needs her the most.

I guess it's an extreme scenerio: choosing between your husband and your kid. But it's an interesting thought, because I'm sure a wife and mother needs to choose which family member to cater to at certain points in her life.

Any thoughts?
(Am I really strange for thinking about this? Ehh...probably.)



Now, to re-emphasize my youth.
Today at college I took a few pictures of my friends and surroundings...and here they iz.

The storage room. Where interesting conversations take place, where we play trumpet songs on tubas, where we see how many bricks we can carry at one time.

Ann Marie and Danielle. The three of us are exclusive celebrators of TOMB SWEEPING DAY.

I have other pictures, but I've learned the hard way that you should load your pictures FIRST and THEN write your blog...otherwise you have to do a lot of dragging and re-spacing.

That's enough for one night.
God bless!
~Briana


-EDIT-
For those of you interested in joining the celebration of Tomb Sweeping Day (or are just curious), here's the Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qingming_Festival

Morning time at our "Cottage"

This is Kitty, when she was a little baby kitten.
Now she is a slightly larger kitten.
I have no reason for posting this other than her cuteness.


Last night Andrew and I determined to wake up a little earlier, so we could enjoy our day together. See, Tuesdays and Thursdays are full school days for me. And because Andrew works second shift, the only time we get to spend together is on Wednesday and Friday afternoons (and a little on Monday mornings). So last night we set the alarm for 8 o clock (he didn't get back till midnight)...and this morning we woke up at 9:30.
Augh.
Despite that small setback, we enjoyed our day. We drank coffee and I made breakfast:

- eggs, sunny-side up
- bacon (turkey, of course)
- toast and butter
- tater tots!

Andrew worked on his budget excel sheet and I fiddled with the HTML stuff for this blog for a while...and then we read some of Zephaniah. I love lazy mornings...the trick is trying to forget all the things that need to be done (in my case, studying for the two tests I have tomorrow).

Then we drank MORE coffee, and after many hugs and "I wish I didn't have to go to school/work"s, we went our separate ways.
All in all, it was a happy morning, and I was glad to have it. :)

Rules Aren't the Enemy

It's the end of a long day, and I hardly have the brains to write a weblog. In fact, probably the LAST thing I should be doing is writing a weblog, seeing as I have a good many papers to write, and even more articles to read.
But there's something so therepeutic about writing for fun. Leave it to school to turn something fun (like reading and writing) into mundane academics.
Here are three things I've been thinking about lately:

1. My development: social, cognitive and moral.
My social development is a little less-than-perfect. I don't FEEL like an awkward person, but I'm afraid I can scare even the most benevolent strangers with my one-word answers and lack of eye-contact. There are days when I feel confident and beautiful...capable of talking to anyone about anything...and there are days when I long to hide behind my colorful striped 3-ring binder, berating myself for ruining a perfectly good conversation.

My cognitive development...well, I get mostly A's, so I'm not worried about my intellectual abilities. :)

Moral development is an interesting thing. According to Lawrence Kohlberg's theory, the highest level of moral development is where a person forms a moral code based on what is good for mankind, and not necessarily based on what other people have established. Sometimes this leads to civil disobedience. This is both fascinating and scary, because a moral code that is not based on biblical truth could go in any direction.
A man spoke in chapel this morning about how we're in danger of throwing out the old testament and forgetting the importance of God's law. He said without the righteousness and justice of God (His law), we'd be apt to create our own moral set, and judge others based on their compliance with it. Having the guts to question authority when it's in the wrong is one thing...but ungrounded disobedience isn't smart at all...and we need to realize that rules, in themselves, aren't the enemy.

2. The "Black and White" problem. Racism in our modern world.
I'm in a 'Diverse Populations' class. We've been talking about racism in its modern form: White advantage. According to many of the articles I've been given, racism is more subtle today, taking the form of hidden priviledges and advantages which are only present for light-skinned people.
I can see the validity of this idea. I hate racism...I wish I could change our world into a place where people respect people, regardless of color and culture.
BUT. There's one thing I don't like...in my class I've felt as thought "white people" have been pinpointed as the single reason for racism.
I don't believe that's true...anyone can be racist. It can't be only the caucasian's problem, right? I can't help but believe that racism is a monster which everyone has helped feed, and now everyone must help destroy. Blaming the whites for all racism isn't going to help much in my opinion (of course, I'm not excusing what my white ancestors did to the African Americans...it was horrible and I can't even imagine what they were thinking).
I'm just beginning to form my own opinions on this...it's a touchy subject, but so important!

3. Decisions.
We all make decisions.
We all make decisions based on our personal feelings and our "gut"...or even based on what other people tell us to do.
We all have made bad decisions and looked back on them, realizing our mistakes.
How can we know how to make the "right" decision, the first time? Do we NEED to make those bad mistakes? Can we avoid those moments?
Can a decision initially be good and then become bad over time?

(I think once God is added to the "decision picture", we have a whole new angle from which to view our lives and consequent choices. God has a way of guiding and directing us, sometimes even when we don't know it. But we also have a free will, so does God LET us make bad decisions? He must...if we truly have a free will. I conclude then, that our job is to seek His will in every decision we make.)


I rather like having a website which no one goes to.
It reminds me of writing your name on a tree...like a secret hid in the open. :)

God bless,
Briana

Myself

Scraps of Splendor, aye?

Life is full of great discoveries, large and small. Sometimes the discoveries are revelational thoughts. Sometimes they're huge realizations. Sometimes they're just great deals on eBay. We add these discoveries to our schema of life, piecing our knowledge together as best we can. These discoveries could be described as scraps. Not complete, not particularly mindblowing...just scraps of understanding that we gather along our way. Scraps of the big picture...scraps of splendor.

So maybe here I can share my own personal scraps of splendor...believing that one day I'll trade my conglomeration of knowledge for a complete garment. Of course, that'll be a while...and I've got plenty to do here on earth first. :)

So here's a bit about me:

My name is Briana. I'm a first born child; bossy, opinionated, somewhat enabling (okay okay, alot) and articulate. You have to get to know me before seeing any of those traits emerge. At face value, I'm reserved and quiet.

I'm a music major...I play trumpet and I'm going to school to be an elementary music teacher.

I'm a Christian...that'll make itself evident without too much prying.

I'm married to the best man on earth. In case you don't believe me, yesterday he cleaned the entire house (even under the couch cushions!) while I was at school. Today he prepared the coffee maker and set out a cup with creamer and a spoon, so that all I'd have to do is push the button to make coffee when I got home. Once he left notes all around the house telling me how beautiful I was and how much he loved me. :)

I have a kitty cat...her name is Kitty. I love her very much. :)

My life is rather simple...although that's not to say it's not busy. School takes up a large amount of time...and when I'm not at school, or doing homework, I'm with Andrew, my family, or at church. You can generally narrow down my location to one of those four places.

Friends? Well...I do have friends. Not the tell-you-all-of-my-secrets and get-together-all-the-time kind...I have a feeling that will come in the future. Right now I'm content with what I do have.

So that's me.

Peace,
~Briana

“Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils”. Louis- Hector Berlioz